Home Lifestyle Beauty LIZ JONES: ‘It’s Unwise to Choose a Bridesmaid Who Is Younger, Thinner,...

LIZ JONES: ‘It’s Unwise to Choose a Bridesmaid Who Is Younger, Thinner, and More Beautiful Than You’

It’s akin to scheduling your wedding during a total solar eclipse, except in this scenario, you find yourself completely overshadowed not by celestial movements, but by the presence of a bridesmaid who is younger, thinner, and more stunning than you ever imagined.

As you walk down the aisle, you can sense heads turning slightly after you pass by. But at the altar, there’s a palpable chill in the air, a foreboding sensation. Birds take flight as if anticipating a storm. You reluctantly hand over your bouquet to this enchantress, feeling utterly outshone, secretly hoping that pollen stains her pastel dress and thorns prick her skin.

Why even invite this Helen of Troy, this epitome of beauty, to play a role on your most important day? The groom’s eyes flicker between you and her, lingering a tad too long on her captivating presence. Can you blame him if he momentarily questions his decision? After all, the woman you’ve chosen embodies every man’s fantasy: the quintessential Barbie doll!

Over the weekend, Margot Robbie—yes, the one with those impossibly elegant limbs, recently seen entwined with Leonardo DiCaprio in “The Wolf of Wall Street,” a woman who effortlessly makes pink gingham look chic and possesses a smile that could blind a man from twenty paces—stood as a bridesmaid for her school best friend. What was her friend’s name again? Ah, Brittany Claxton! At one point, Brittany was spotted donning sunglasses, perhaps to shield herself from the radiance of her old friend.

Forget “Barbie vs. Oppenheimer” at the box office; this situation warrants a nuclear reaction! Margot simply looked impeccable. She fashioned an ivory silk halterneck gown that complemented her hair and moved with grace. For the Las Vegas-themed festivities the following day, she donned—surprise, surprise!—a Barbie pink tutu. Did Brittany brace herself for this display, or did her internal lamentations persist throughout the day?

Now, I’m slightly concerned that she invited her old friend along for the honeymoon. Apparently, it’s become a trend to include friends and family in post-wedding travels. The allure of witnessing Margot in a bikini might make it tempting to just push her overboard.

So, what’s the protocol here? Should you ever select a stunning bridesmaid, even if she’s happily married like Margot? Is it acceptable to choose someone younger, slimmer, and more accomplished than yourself? Or do you have the right to exclude her because it’s your day and yours alone?

Choosing a beauty for this prominent role could be akin to sending a canary into a coal mine—her interactions with the groom might reveal valuable insights, potentially saving you from future heartache. It’s better to discern his susceptibility now.

However, having your own version of Barbie as a bridesmaid is a gamble on your future happiness. Yet, you can be savvy about mitigating her impact. Consider the approach taken by fashion blogger Lauren Perez at her wedding, where she enlisted supermodels Bella Hadid and Kendall Jenner as bridesmaids but outfitted them in affordable £207 dresses—a supermodel equivalent of a bargain find.

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