A transgender man who gave birth to a boy last year says he feels isolated among the LGBTQ+ community, and he regularly has to ask himself ‘where do I fit?’ Ware, from Atlanta, gave birth to his child in May 2022.
But he said he has struggled to fit in the LGBTQ+ community as a new father who is also transgender.
‘It’s like, where do I fit? Because a lot of trans men don’t want to be open about their queerness,’ here said while fighting back tears, he told nonprofit news site The 19th.
He was among a group of eight transgender black men who spoke during a Human Rights Campaign Foundation workshop about their experiences in the transgender and LGBTQ+ communities.
The group singled out gay cisgender men for being problematic, saying their experience was that they often didn’t stand up for them despite also being part of the LGBTQ+ community.
One member of the group, Alex Santiago, said he felt more scrutinized within queer spaces, with men no longer calling him ‘bro’ after finding out he is trans.
Ash Patrick Schade became pregnant while transitioning, facing transphobia as a new father and experiencing severe gender dysphoria — but his daughter, he said, was worth it.
I’m a trans man who got pregnant after a Grindr hookup: ‘All worth it’.
‘That’s a weird space to be in, but it happens more often than not,’ he told The 19th.
Ware (pictured below) can be seen in Instagram photos smiling brightly alongside his partner, Alphonso Mills, at their baby shower, and holding their child.
Ware transitioned from female to male at 22 and said he grappled with his identity during his pregnancy, especially living in Georgia.
‘It made me question my identity. How does the world now see me? How will they see me? Will they understand who I am?’ he told the outlet.
‘Pregnant women are celebrated. Trans people are not. And to be a pregnant trans man just made me feel vulnerable in the world,’ he added.
Ware says he centers himself through his faith in God and credits his sucesses in life to following his motto: ‘Live Life Whole. Be your complete self, and live life fully.’