The Duchess of Sussex is in mourning. But we’ll get back to that. First, let’s go to the day we met, this past summer, at the venerated San Ysidro Ranch in Montecito, Calif. The ranch is a low-key old luxury resort with simple bungalows tucked into a mountainside overlooking the Pacific coast.
It’s the kind of unpretentious but protected place wealthy locals and L.A. transplants come to be treated like royalty. On one witheringly hot day in late August, however, they got to mingle with the real thing.
That morning, the Duchess of Sussex, known more commonly by her maiden name, Meghan Markle, sped past a group of 60-something women who’d made the trek to Montecito to celebrate a milestone birthday.
Teetering on the dusty cobblestone walkway in their wedges and kitten heels, the group stopped dead as Meghan waved and smiled from a golf cart delivering her to her Variety cover shoot. “Can you imagine?” said one of the women wistfully after the duchess had passed, perhaps talking about the life she has led thus far — an American woman meeting and marrying a handsome young prince beloved by all the world — or maybe, as we were there to discuss, the life she’s leading now.
It actually is hard to imagine. For most of her public life as the Duchess of Sussex, Meghan has been described as many things: disingenuous, calculating, determined, relatable, even Diana-like. But spend a day with her, and you’ll witness a side that the public hasn’t seen: the nerdy American mom.
Meghan talks about how she loves to watch “Jeopardy!” and do Wordle in bed with a glass of wine. She absentmindedly raps her son’s favorite song (a track about the Tyrannosaurus rex from “Ask the StoryBots”) and talks enthusiastically about Beyoncé (specifically, how “Cozy” is her favorite song from the new album).
And what about all the photos you’ve seen of her with that guarded smile? At the shoot, she couldn’t have been more at ease as she shook the hand of every crew member, stylist and photographer’s assistant. She shrugged off the pop singers of contemporary radio in favor of her own “1970s road trip playlist.” She addressed questions about the past few years head-on. She burst out laughing at the drop of a hat, almost like a princess in a Hollywood movie. When asked what she wanted most out of life, she said, “Joy. That’s really it. It’s everything that we can work toward for ourselves, our friends, our kids, those around us — that would feel so good. And we do feel joyful.”
Nearly three weeks before press time, though — eight days after she stopped the birthday revelers in their tracks at the San Ysidro Ranch — the prince’s grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, died at her Scottish estate Balmoral. The world watched and mourned as the longest-reigning monarch in British history was laid to rest and celebrated for what Meghan says was the “shining example” of female leadership.
Following the official period of mourning, Meghan agrees to sit again for a lengthy discussion about her road to the present. She worries that any comments about the queen or her in-laws will be “a distraction” from continued mourning, but presses on to celebrate the icon.
She grows animated talking about the warmth and support she received from the thousands of citizens she interacted with during her time in the U.K., not to mention the two significant content deals she and Prince Harry struck with streaming giants Netflix and Spotify; the two young children — Archie Harrison, 3, and Lilibet Diana, 1 — at the center of the Sussex household; the singular mission behind Archewell; and how tenaciously she has fought to build the life and company of her dreams.
