Actress Onyeka Onwenu speaks again about her toxic marriage
and how it constantly left her depressed.
Onwenu narrated how her husband refused to help with the children’s
tuition and made demands of her that left her without a social life. The author
who clocked 70 in January, said she was, at a point in the marriage, constantly
depressed that her kids began to take note of her mood.
She said: “Unless it happens to you, you really don’t understand the
sacrifices that women make. It’s about the love thing, it’s about the children
as well. We want to preserve a home where there is a father and there is a
unit.”
Advising other women, Onyeka urged women to not wait to be killed or
stay in a toxic marriage because of their children. She added that one has to
be alive to take care of their children as being dead will only make them
suffer more.
She said: “But if it’s going to
take your life, get out fast, run! Because your children without you will
suffer more. And by the way, you don’t need to be in an environment where there
is emotional trauma, and emotional abuse, to the extent that the woman is
constantly depressed.
“And there were years where I was constantly depressed and my children
noticed. On my fiftieth birthday, my first son was asked what he wished his
mother, and he said something that struck me. He said he just wants the mother
to be happy. I was surprised, I was shocked that I didn’t fool these guys.
“And I took a decision that day to fight for my happiness—my
fulfillment, my joy and not waiting for my husband to take care of me as he
used to, and should do. I decided to do all of that for myself and there was a change.”
