Ex-CNN Correspondent: ”I Never Thought I’d Be 46, Divorced, Single And Having a Baby On My Own”

If you’d told the 16-year-old me that at 46, I’d be divorced, single and having a baby on my own — by choice! — I’d have shuddered and firmly said “no!” Back then, I had very definite ideas about the future course my personal life would take, and it didn’t look like this. I imagined something way more straightforward and dare I say it, conventional.

I’ve been blessed to build the career of my dreams over decades as a journalist — 13 years on air for CNN International, traveling the world to cover global events and interviewing presidents, movie stars and world leaders. I published a book, became a UN Goodwill Ambassador and started a nonprofit to help empower African girls, but in my quiet moments the one thing I wanted the most, to become a mother, remained out of reach.

A brief marriage to a kind man didn’t result in children, and then the year I turned 40, my mum had a catastrophic stroke, leaving me no emotional space to contemplate anything other than caring for her. Six years went by and a few months ago I found myself in a subpar relationship with a man who took about 12 hours to reply to all my texts, among other red flags. It was then, in the aftermath of our inevitable breakup, that it hit me: Not having a child would be the greatest regret of my life. And with my biological clock ticking down, if I was waiting for the right man to come along before I did it, well, I might just find myself out of time.